My Gralphabet

Day Two of the Gratitude Challenge: Use the alphabet as a fun and quick format for making a list of things for which you feel grateful. Share this list through email, a blog post or a Facebook page.

A  The Artisanal Table - a new Pizzeria and Enoteca (Italian Wine Shop) in downtown Bellevue with truly wonderful pizzas and wines.  My new favorite place.

B  Billings - a fine place to grow up.  And filled with many, many friends who are coming alongside my parents as my dad recovers from a stroke.  I am so, so grateful.

C  California Baby Calming Shampoo and Bodywash - makes my darlings smell even more delicious.

D  Daughter - I am thrilled to be Mama to my sweet baby girl.

E  Elsa Peretti - thank you for designing such beautiful jewelry.  Every time I catch a glimpse of the lovely necklace my husband gave to me, I feel like a princess.

F  Foster School of Business - I experienced invigorating work, amazing colleagues and inspirational students during my eight years at UW.  Even now, many of my dearest friends share business school roots. 

G  Grace - God's unmerited favor.

H  Husband - 10 years of marriage to one handsome hunk.

I  In-laws - or "in-loves" as my mom says.  I love the people that marriage added to my family: father-in-law, mother-in-law, three sisters-in-law, and two brothers-in-law.  Dear to me, all.

J  Japan - my first and favorite international experience.

K  Kim - who inspired me to take this challenge. And who has been a bosom buddy for 15 years.

L  Lihue - "the Gateway to Kauai."  We flew into Lihue for our honeymoon 10 years ago and we'll fly into Lihue next spring to spend a week relaxing with some of our favorite friends.  Can't wait!

M  Motorcycle - the one I want to own someday.  Glad for the dream.

N  Nuclear family - both my childhood and my current.  I have lots of love for Papa, Mom and my brothers.  And I adore my hubby, my Jeeper and my CeCe.

O  Orange (but not oranges) - Orange is a long-time favorite color.  So bright and fun.

P  my Pals/Peeps/People - Super grateful for my friends.  If this list wasn't alphabetical you all would be at the top.  I love every one of you.

Q  Quilts - My mom just got excited when she read that.  But sadly for her, I wrote quilts, not quilting.  You see, my mom is a quilter and I love the beautiful works of art she makes for my family.  Maybe someday it will say quilting, Mom.  But not today.

R  Red Tano handbag - I'm grateful that it is beautifully crafted and just the perfect style and color, but my favorite part is that my husband picked it out for me when he was on a business trip in NYC.  Awww, what a guy!

S  Son - He is my angel.

T  Triple Thanks - Trader Joes.  TiVo.  Tea (lots of ice, no sweetener and a slice of lemon.)

U  U2 - thanks to my friend Wolm for the U2 intro and to my husband for the U2 enthusiasm and education over the years.

V  the View out my kitchen window - so green, cool and comforting.

W  Wedding in the UK - thank you Sonja and Dan for the opportunity to be part of such a warm and wonderful event!  It was the trip of a lifetime.

X  XoXo - kisses from my kiddos.

Y  Yoga - even though it has been way too long since I've practiced... it really changed my life when I did.

Z  Zoom, zoom, zoom - LOVE my Mazda.  So zippy, easy and fun.  I want the CX-9 next!  Whoops, that isn't gratitude.  Well, I AM grateful for my current Mazda even as I covet my next one.  Heh, heh, heh.

Gratitude Schmatitude

Since returning from Montana, I've been "down in the grumps." I called Bea and asked her to meet me at Frost Doughnuts thinking maybe a bacon maple bar would get out of my funk. We are going tomorrow so I'll let you know.  In the meantime I went to see my therapist and we discussed my dad's stroke, my mom's stress, my kid's whining and my disappointment over not being selected as a Verity Mom finalist.  Her recommendation?  Keep up with "self-care."  Umm, oooh-kay.  Easier said than done when you are a busy mom of little ones.  Does a really delicious gourmet doughnut count?  

So, I made plans for my husband and in-laws to give me some time off this weekend, found a babysitter for a grown-ups only dinner on Sunday and scheduled a massage for a week from now.  Still felt grumpy.  Called Moe, our angelic mother's helper and she came over and played with the little ones for a while.  She even picked up all the toys while she was here.  I was beginning to feel a little better.  Met my husband at the door and told him HE was taking the kids to dinner.  Hmm... this self-care business just might work!  I feel less grumpy already.  

A bowl of cold cereal and a half-hour of peace and quiet later, I found the final piece in my grump-banishment plan.  The Tiny Prints Gratitude Challenge.  I learned about it from my friend Kim, over at gratitude365.  She had already started the 21-day challenge and I felt encouraged when I read her posts.  And not only because I am included on one of her gratitude lists.  So I'm going to do it.  And today is my day #1.  The assignment for the first day is to write about why I accepted this challenge and what I hope to achieve.

I accepted this challenge because most of my thoughts today are about why I am NOT grateful:  There are dirty dishes in the sink.  A friend's father passed away yesterday after a long fight with cancer.  The kids broke our laptop this morning.  I could go ON and ON.  But it isn't helping to make a list of what stinks.  I need to shift my perspective.  I know there are hundreds of things that I can celebrate right now, even though it feels like an effort to come up with a list.  Thankfully, I don't need to make a list until tomorrow's assignment!  And what I hope to achieve is the strength to choose grateful.  Maybe not every single time, but more of the time and even when times are rough. I know the benefits will be worth the challenge.

Favorite Photo Friday

I haven't taken any photos this week.  I have been in Montana trying to be helpful to my mom and dad because my dad had a stroke a week and a half ago.  So this Friday, I'm featuring a favorite photo I took last fall when my dad took Jeeper fishing.  My dad is showing improvement everyday and I look forward to a not-too-distant day when he can return to his favorite hobby!   I love you, Papa.

Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day

In addition to all my tension, worry, stress and upset because my dad is in the hospital recovering from a stroke (almost 1000 miles away), yesterday was stinky because:

Jeep broke a beautiful little dish that I brought back from Japan over ten years ago.

CeCe "the Destroyer" found (by getting past the kid-lock on the bathroom cupboard) and ruined my favorite lipstick. Lipstick under tiny fingernails is OH SO fun to clean up!

My mom (understandably) had a huge emotional breakdown.

Mother Nature brought me a "gift." (Let's pretend I didn't just write that.)

More great moms applied to be the Verity Mom. Including a professional blogger. She probably has a clean house and nice handwriting too. Grrr.

My husband got a speeding ticket. Okay, that was actually a couple of days ago, but I was still really mad about it yesterday.

Jeep whined. CeCe fussed.

And some other stuff. That I can't think of today. But it sure seemed like a really bad day. Except for the moments when it didn't. Like when we took a walk as a family to the local park. And during the phone calls from dear friends who wanted me to know they love me and are thinking of me and my family. And when my husband put the kids to bed so I could go to the gym. And when I was eating the brownie sundae I made when I got home.

So maybe it wasn't exactly a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. But I hope today is better.

I Don't Like This Sandwich

In the middle of this weekend's usual events -- dishes, bedtime routines, a trip to the store -- and extraordinary events -- homemade raspberry pancakes, our 10th wedding anniversary, an afternoon to myself -- I received a call that my dad had been admitted to the hospital and appears to have had a stroke.  Diaper changes and meal preparations were suddenly interrupted by frequent phone calls, sobbing fits and internet searches for flight schedules to Montana.  His condition is stable enough that the testing that will give insight into what happened has to wait for the holiday to pass.  So I am on hold.  And in limbo. Sandwiched between worrying about my dad and working with my kids.  I pick up CeCe's stack of blocks and at the same time I fall apart at the thought of my dad struggling to communicate.  My dad!  One of the most talkative, verbal and opinionated people I know.  I sit and sound out words with Jeep and I get a lump in my throat because, in his current state, my dad can't remember how to read.  My dad!  The one who taught me to love reading with his example of devouring book, after book, after book.

As a parent myself, I don't have the freedom to give my dad all the attention I want to give him.  I want to be on a plane yesterday.  I want to be at the hospital asking questions, holding his hand and making sure my mom gets time off to rest and eat.  But who will look after our kids while I take care of my dad?  Do I take one or both or none with me?  What favors do we call in from friends and neighbors and when?  How can we choose between the plane tickets and preschool tuition?  How do we make responsible financial decisions for our family -- our whole family?  There isn't a guidebook or one clear black and white answer right now.  And so I pray for the strength to make the best decision I can -- for my kids, my husband, my self, and especially for my dad.